Restraint – Living with the Brakes On

Living with restraint can be the result of feeling safe and comfortable with conformity. It can be a habit we adopt when we don’t want to rock the boat and disappoint another person by outshining them. We may hold back some of our abilities and tone ourselves down in order to appear humble or make someone else feel better by trying to show we are the same as they are. This results in limitation and rationalisation.

Too much holding back damages the spontaneous spirit of joy that courses through our veins when we are open to new ideas. Messages are received best when we are relaxed and flowing, living with our guard down and not crippled by justifications, blame or repetition.

It doesn’t matter whether we are rich or poor, old or young, vibrant or frail, contact with the Super Conscious force of the universe comes from our willingness to ask the ‘personal’ self to step aside. When we move away from ‘personal’ there is access to a power greater than we are, the all-knowing mind or consciousness of all things.

We live within the intelligence of the universe but may only be accessing the known parts we have personally achieved – our personal work, our level of academic intelligence and the circumstances within which we love and have attained our network of experience. Though we know there is more we may have difficulty manifesting aspects of the subtle realm, preferring to maintain the known rhythm of our limited wheel of worldly attainment – the small picture – a better job, house, car, clothes, holidays and relationships – finite realities that we use as signposts of growth.

There is nothing wrong with this and we all chase these things, but when attention to these false conditions dominates our thinking and renders us insecure if we don’t have them, we are on the wheel of restraint, even though we seem to be moving ahead!

Spiritual development is something other than this; it is the awakening of the whole self and does not have a finite measurement that can be displayed for others to see. It can be a spine tingling realisation that without all the material things and personal successes we can still exist fully and have a purpose. Security comes from the peace of knowing we are part of the invisible plane of existence.

If we abandon our story – who we think we are, what we do for a living, the situations that have brought us to where we are now, where we live, where we’ve been, who we’ve known and what has ‘happened’ to us, we are free and available to contact the precious realm of the spirit within – the nameless, all-knowing power of existence.

This all-knowing plane of existence does not have a personality or know what stains or stamps of worthiness are on our character. It is a channel of power that streams through us directly when we allow ourselves to ‘get out of the way’ and become open to its healing.

Sometimes it is just nice to simply call on that energy to take our place, as if we are moving out of our own way to allow the greater consciousness to step in and be in contact through us. This is the Divine Will that knows no bounds, the font of all knowledge available to every man.

When we set aside the ego level of our personality – the achievements, the self-doubt, the worry and fear, the needs we think we want satisfied and the obligations we carry – in that moment of clearance there is a pure space for the energy of the subtle realm to come in and be received through us, unblocking our restraint.

All our cells respond to this pure essence of life that is always available.

If we have intentionally come to a standstill for fear of where to go next then restraint is a natural rest stop along the way, until we have the courage to make a decision.

Our mental thoughts create an atmosphere around us that is felt by others. These thoughts also send messages to the Universal Sub-Conscious Mind, indicating whether we are open to receive new information or are in lockdown, living with the brakes on, responding only to our own intelligence and conditioned perceptions.

It may be easier to recognise a habit of denial in a friend, colleague or family member rather than in ourselves, but denial is real for each of us. No one is immune from getting stuck in a denial pattern and defending ourselves to hide a pain we feel unable to deal with or an experience we are not safe enough to heal. It is unfair to judge another or ourselves for this blindness of spirit.

If denial patterns linger and become a lifetime fixture – which does happen – then we will always be living with the brakes on. When it feels as if the brakes are on it may be necessary to ask within for what it is that we are denying in ourselves; this will unlock the energy again.

Find time to access the part of yourself that protects, denies and finds restraint comfortable. Give that unawakened part the safety needed to find expression. This can happen simply by acknowledging there has been denial even if you are unclear what that denial has been about. In doing so, a window opens up.

Karen Cohen
© Copyright 2010

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